Start with Someone Easy
If goodwill toward yourself feels artificial, begin with a person or animal for whom care arises naturally, then gradually widen the field.
Loving-Kindness and Goodwill
Loving-kindness meditation trains a deliberate attitude of goodwill. It is not about pretending that you like everyone or manufacturing strong emotion. The practice is to repeatedly incline the mind toward non-hostility and care.
Simple Phrases
Silently repeat a few phrases such as: “May I be safe. May I be well. May I live with ease.” Then, when appropriate, extend the same wish to another person.
Do Not Force Emotion
The intention matters more than producing warmth on command. Some sessions feel dry. Continue gently without judging the result.
Compassion Is Not Passivity
In Buddhist practice, compassion can include clear boundaries and firm action. Goodwill does not require approving harmful behavior.
A Short Practice to Try
- Settle for a minute. Notice your breathing and soften unnecessary tension.
- Bring someone easy to mind. Choose a person or animal you naturally care about.
- Offer one phrase slowly. For example, “May you be well.” Leave a little space before repeating it.
- Include yourself if it feels workable. Use “May I be well,” without demanding a particular feeling.
- Widen gently. End with a wish for the wellbeing of others, then return to your day.
You do not need to begin with someone who has hurt you. Keep the practice manageable and let goodwill grow gradually.
Sources and Further Reading
These published teachings provide further context. The short exercises on this site are introductory suggestions, not quotations from the source texts.